Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Owe'n me big time!


I'm losing it. Seriously-losing my mind. Now the pink eye is "mostly" cleared up and it's a good thing as we've lost the drops. Tim came home from work yesterday wit clod chills and was burning up...this continued into this am. Thus, I took him to Urgent Care. He apparently has strep throat, but I really don't know why they are so confident of that since they didn't even do a rapid strep test (they did do the old fashioned throat swab which we won't have results for for 24 hours (that's a lot of 4's in a sentence;-).

I took TJ and a neighbor kid to the workreation program today and it was fine. There were a ton of kids and they are split into 4 groups. One of the kids in TJ's group was horsing around and made TJ fall and his sandal "broke". The super minds that "supervise" the kids decided to staple it back together. Genius. So, he got his free admission to the pool for his hour of service but I had to go to Target to get him new sandals so it really cost me $10 bucks. And since I spent $60 at Target, I'm really in the hole from this whole volunteering thing;-)

When I got home and realized how bad Tim was, I decided it was best to take him to Urgent care but the boys had just gotten in the neighbor's pool and I felt so guilty telling them to get out so I left them there...ok, not exactly, I asked their mom to watch them while I took Tim and Owen.

That brings me to Owen. Ugh. He's so, so, so naughty. I seriously am unable to express how poorly he has been behaving. Words will not do it justice. Remember the crying video I posted recently-take that times every waking hour when he's not outside or eating and that comes close to describing his temperament. Two examples:

At urgent care, he was poopy when we arrived. So, I took him to change him and he cried (no not because he has a belly ache nor diaper rash) just because he didn't want his diaper changed. Once we were back in the exam room, if we wouldn't let him play with the computer mouse (he would pretend like it was a phone, go figure) he would scream. Oh, when I say cry-it really means SCREAM! Then he pooped again. Mind you another normal poo, so I went to change him AGAIN. He screams some more. I take him back into the exam room where the MD is finally with Tim. Owen continues screaming so I have to take him out AGAIN. I take him to the van. Against my better judgement, I start the vehicle and crank the AC and strap him in (all while he's kicking and screaming). I can't take it, so I stand outside in the heat and call my sis to tell her to shoot me now (I really did this). I could see him while on the phone and he continued to cry. Tim finally came outside and we *had* to get in the car. Owen continued to cry. I asked Tim while driving down the road, if it was normal that I wanted to hurt him right now and he assured me that it was ok.

***Disclaimer***I really DO NOT want to hurt him (well, I do actually, but I won't because I know better and love him so much...but I know why some people lose their tempers and mess up their lives hurting their children. If you have never felt this way (meaning your child nearly drives you insane) please consider yourself so blessed and realize that I love my kids soooo sooo much but right now, I don't like him very much(and neither would you).

Second example: I had an exam for life insurance yesterday and they welcomed the kids to come along. Big surprise, Owen screamed his way through most of it. The poor lady was nearly yelling to ask me questions and by the end, I'm sure she had marked a big "DENIED" due to my obviously stressful lifestyle.

I really do adore Owen-he's just not a good boy right now. I pray it's only a phase and a short one at that. I am so contemplating calling the pedi to tell them about his outbursts. Maybe I'll give him his binky back-it all started then-UGH! Right now, thank the Lord for naptime and bedtime. He's seriously only truly content while playing outside or with animals or sometimes eating.

Here's the good, the bad, an the ugly on his 19 month "what he's up to" stats. He has 8 teeth still, 4 center ontop, 2 top molars, 2 bottom center. I think he's cutting more-but who knows? He's saying bubble, dog (and woof), ball, TJ, Jake, Mom, Dad, and Uh-oh. These seem to be his basic needs so he's all set in the word department;-) He is a good sleeper (the good). He's an outside kid (the good and bad), and as I mentioned above, he's quite discontent lately (the ugly). He has mastered going up and down the stairs (without falling). He adores playing with the boys, especially outside of course. He tries to mimic what they do and he has no fear factor. He walks into the road (uh, I mean runs) if you turn your back for a moment. He got his first sunburn (slightly pink arms and cheeks and neck) recently when I forgot clouds can do that;-). I am posting pics of him in the stroller. It took many shots to get him to remotely smile -I said cookie and he cracked a grin through his closed eyes which is what he does when he's mad at me. That is, until the full blown tantrum sets in. It's kinda funny as it's a stormy background and there is a for sale sign behind him-any takers? Speaking of the stormy background, I have changed my song list again to have "Praise you in this storm" first as I think it's a great song and it's really what I am having to do alot right now both literally (b/c we've had tons of stormy weather) and figuratively b/c all this adversity is really wearing on me. And I know in the grand scheme of things, all my current trials are soooo soooo small but all ontop of each other, I just need a little respite from my life. Thus, tomorrow, Lord Willing, it's supposed to be 90 and we are heading to the pool!

Owen weighs in: Today I had him weighed and measured for his monthly progress (or lack thereof in this case) chart. He weighed 1 ounce less at a whoppin' 18 pound 8 ounces. And was shorter (shocking) at 28 3/4 inches. His head was up a minuscule amount to 37 cm. How does this measure up? Weight=that of an average 7 month old, Height=that of an average 10 month old, head=that of an average 14 month old. Other average 19 month old boys are approx. 24 1/2 pounds and 32 1/2 inches. Unfortunately, Owen is falling off his growth curve (meaning the one he has been following) even worse. I have no idea what to do with this (info). I guess I'll just vent about it here and maybe someone from comcast will comment and offer to fix it (he, he).

Speaking of my cable, does anyone have satellite TV and have opinions on it?

I think I'd better finish my rant now as it's officially taken me 2 hours to compose this with all the interruptions from Tim, the boys (not Owen-he's still napping;o), the laundry, etc.


Lindsay said...

Renay, I'm so sorry. The tantrums are definitely not fun, and it sounds like Owen is definitely giving you a run for your money. I can do tantrum duty while you take a few relaxing rounds on the lazy river tomorrow, okay? Hopefully, our fun in the sun will cure some of these tantrums!!

April said...

Im sorry as well! I know it is such a trying time. Mason was my tantrum thrower. haha But on a positive note...the jogging stroller looks great! I was alsowondering if we could join ya at the pool tomorrow? Are you making it a family thing or is it just you?

Jennifer said...

I'm not proud of this but...I smacked Catherine once and actually left a hand sized bruise! Ouch! She was a frustrating little bugger. This too shall pass Renay. Hang in there.

Kim said...

OMG I totally don't think you are a bad parent. There are times we love our children, but do not like them. Pretty much I think that is how my parents dealt with me through high school. I did not drink or do drugs, just everything was a MAJOR DRAMA! Preston sometimes makes me so frustrated I literally walk out of the room and just leave him to cry/play do what he wants. It does pass however.

Sorry that you don't have answers about the growth chart and Owen's growth. As frustrating as that is, just focus on his developmental milestones. I try to not think of the growth charts that much until pediatrician or geneticist.

Your comment about the Comcast people helping you out made me laugh so hard. Even through all the hell, your sense of humor does not fade. How did Comcast come across your blog?

Hang in there and big hugs from me.

amy f. said...

What a trying day! I know what you mean about wanting to hurt, um...sometimes. We are on day 3 of being stuck inside and Alex's behavior was SO AWful today, it was a rough one. My desire to watch Owen for you is so strong, it really is!! You never take me up on it. However, it is a challenge for none of our kids to be ill, ugh!

Love the jogging stroller!

Katie said...

I think that EVERY parent has been where you are at one point in there life. I have not, but ONLY because my guy is only 10 months old. My dad called to remind me yesterday of how I acted at 13...I was a nightmare and my parents wanted to sell me to the lowest bidder! I love reading your posts because you always keep you humor in the midst of all the chaos.
If I were you though, I may call the doctor and just mention these outbursts. You never know? Just my 2 cents! Hang in there girl!!!

Jessica said...

All I can say is...I'm thinking of you! I feel ya to an extent. You'd maybe never know it, but Helene is my strong willed child. She has such the snotty 17 yr old girl attitude at home somtimes. We do our best to straighten her out and deal with it. I wonder why she does it???? We don't let her get away with it and certainly do not encourage anything remotely close! My saying for her..."Helene's personality and drive will take her far in life, but right now it's taking me over the edge!"

Andrea said...

I've had so many days like these! Right now I feel cooped to the front yard or inside because taking the two youngest anywhere is so unpredictable! Aaaargh...I feel you!

I'm with Kim on the milestones, that is the biggest concern, you know he is tiny, so focus on making sure he can do all the things kids his age are doing.

Rita said...

Renay; I'm sorry you have had such a bad time, they do outgrow it.
Bad parents do hurtful things..
Good parents like you do exactly what you did.
Take a Mommy time out.
I have had my fair share of Mommy time outs...

It makes life better for you and the kids.

Keep up the good work, you are doing fine.

Next time you all go to the pool let me know, Kaitlynn and I would love to join you.

Lots of love